Hats Off To Larry

Hats off to Larry,
He broke your heart,
Just like you broke mine when you
Said we must part.
He told you lies, now it's
Your turn to CRY CRY CRY-Y
Now that Larry said goodbye to you.
(Music and Lyrics by Del Shannon)

Water
The ocean
Deep water
I am in
Way over
My head
I am floating
On a huge
Truck tire
Inner tube
Bobbing
Up and down
In a total
Panic
I do not
Know how to
Swim
I am six years old
And Larry
Has pulled me out
To the middle
Of nowhere
He is grinning
Maniacally
From ear to ear
Larry thinks
He is my father
He thinks
I am his son
We play our parts
We play our roles
Like actors
Like fakers
Like clowns
In the circus
Larry is trying
To make me
In his own image
He wants me
To be a man
He wants to
Toughen me up
So that I won’t be
A cry baby
A sissy boy
A mama’s boy
All the things
That I really was
So I was crying
Like a cry baby
Like a sissy boy
Like a mama’s boy
And Larry was
Laughing at me
Taunting me
Making fun of me
Mimicking me
“What’s a matta
Little sissy boy?
You afraid of
The water?
Is that it
Little cry baby?
Sissy boy
Is afraid of
The water?”
Meanwhile
I’m screaming
At the top
Of my lungs
I’m yelling
For my mother
Who is no where
Around
As usual
Who even knows
Where she is?
I sure never knew
Mom came and went
Like the wind
She was a ghost
A shadow
Even when
She was home
I was never
Really sure
If she was there
Sitting by herself
Lost in her
Own thoughts
Sad
Depressed
Lonely
Pining for
The good
Old days
When my
Father was still alive
And she did not
Have all of
The responsibilities
All of the cares
And no resources
With which
To combat
The vicissitudes
Of life
That hounded
Her ever foot step
But those days
Were long gone
My father was dead
And he was not coming back
He could not help
Her
Or me
Or anyone
Because
He was dead
And the dead
Stay dead
And they
Do not
Come back
To help
The people
That they
Have left
Behind
Despite
The many
Fairy tales
That people
Like to tell
To comfort
Themselves
And to shield
Themselves
From so many
Bitter truths
But who can
Blame them?

It is tough enough
To have to live
Through the whole
Of one's life
Without a
Shoulder
To cry on
So there I was
Yelling
For my mother
To come and
Save me

But I knew that
She would not come
I knew that she
Wasn’t there
She was never there!
Whenever I really needed
Her help
She was never there!

But I didn’t blame
Her for that
What I blamed her for
What I really did
Blame her for
Was for everything else!
I blamed her
For everything
That had ever
Gone wrong
In our lives
I blamed her for
Every Goddamned thing!

It was no wonder
That we had begun
To resent each other
It was no wonder
That she so often
Left me
To fend for myself
Unless I was with
My sister
Or with Larry
As I was today
Being dragged out
To the middle
Of the ocean
Clinging for
Dear life
To an inflated
Truck tire
Inner tube
Wondering if
I was going
To drown
Wondering if
I would ever
Make it back
To shore
Wondering if
Anyone
Would even
Notice
If I was gone
Or if I was
Missing
Or if I was
Dead
Or if I was
Still alive

jhmarkowitz
Philadelphia, Pa. 2011

Down In North Miami Beach

Hangin' in the Treme
Watchin' people sashay
Past my steps
By my porch
In front of my door

Church bells are ringin'
Choirs are singing
While the preachers groan
And the sisters moan
In a blessed tone

Down in the treme
Just me and my baby
We're all going crazy
While jamming and having fun
(Words and music by John Boutte)

Florida
Miami
1952
Me and my family
Living like
Gypsies
In a North Miami Beach
Roach motel
Euphemistically named
Lindenwood Gardens

I am five years old
And did not
Know shit
From shinola
(And still don’t
If you really
Want to know
But I digress)

We actually
Did have
A real house
To live in
Once upon
A time
To the best
Of my recollection
In Brooklyn
In Seagate
For a little while
At least
Life was
Almost
Normal

I do sort of
Remember
One beautiful
Fall day
In particular
It was Halloween
And all the kids
Were dressed up
In costumes
Banging on doors
Shouting
Trick or treat!
Trick or treat!

I was dressed
As a pirate
In a costume
That was all
Homemade
From
Aluminum foil
And cardboard
And the obligatory
Eye patch
I must have
Cut quite a
Dashing figure
And then
Before
You could say
Jackie Robinson
It was all over

For reasons
I never was
Able to fathom
For reasons
That were never
Fully explained
My whole family
My whole universe
Suddenly
Uprooted themselves
And moved
Lock
Stock and
Barrel
All the way
Down south
To Florida
To North Miami Beach
In 1952

At the time
My so-called family
My whole universe
Consisted of
Me
Mom
My older sister Yetta
My other older sister Flora
Her husband Larry
And their
Two daughters
Who were
My two nieces
One younger
One older

And we all soon
Found ourselves
Living like gypsies
In a roach motel
In North Miami Beach

By the time
I turned six
I could not
Remember
Any other life
And if I did
It just seemed
To be
Like a
Vanished
Dream

jhmarkowitz
Philadelphia, 2011

Water Water Everywhere

I often get
Especially angry
Whenever I read or hear
That the fresh water
Drinking supply
Of mother earth
Is being threatened
By pollution or
Overuse
Or
Some terrorist attack
Or by whatever new
Threat our
So called civilization
May conjure up
Without fresh water
To drink
We are all dead
Water is the universal
Solvent of life
Our own bodies
Are ninety percent
Water

Did you know that
Nearly 1 billion people
Worldwide
Do not have
Safe water to drink?
Did you know that
Worldwide
A child dies
Every 15 seconds
From a lack
Of clean water
To drink?

1 in 4 children
Who die before age 5
Die of water
Related disease
Children in Africa
Must often walk
Miles every day
To collect
Dirty water
To drink
This can and must
Change

Please take
The time to discover
The Water Project
Sponsored by Bill Gates
Together we can
And must
Make a difference

Think about this
The next time
You pour yourself
A nice cool
Cold glass
Of pure
Clean
Water
To drink
(www.thewaterproject.org)

jkmarkowitz
Philadelphia, Pa. 2011

Wedding And Funeral Families

Some families
Go gaga
For weddings
While
Other families
Only get
Together
Around
The death
Of a
Family member

On the whole
The older
I get
I seem to prefer
Attending
The funerals more

In my family
Funerals
Are cheerful
Events
We say good bye
To whoever
Just died
Whether
Beloved or not
Then we
All go home
And have
Some
Sponge cake
And wine
To celebrate
The passing
Of the
Recently
Deceased
Then perhaps
We all go
Out to dinner
For a really
Good meal
Paid for
As likely
As not
With the deceased
Person’s
Own money
As the surviving heirs
Splurge
The inheritance money
That they really
Didn’t expect
To get

Weddings
On the other hand
Are far more
Depressing affairs
The statistics
Are against
The couples
Right out of the gate
With 50% of marriages
Ending in divorce
Within the first
Ten years of marriage
Of course
No one
Wants to bring
Up this bit
Of information
While
The
Happy couple
Tries to get
Through
The wedding
Ceremony
As fast
As possible
So that they
Can go on a
Honeymoon
And finally
Be able to
Get away from all
The hoopla
And finally
Be able
To get on
With their every day
Lives
And who can
Blame them
After all it is
Hard enough
Trying to get
Through this
Life of toil
And trouble
As a single person
So from an economic
Standpoint
Perhaps two
Really can live as
Cheaply as one
But I rather
Doubt it

As a single
Divorced man
I feel
Distinctly
Uncomfortable
Around
Married couples
I never know
Quite what
To say
So I tend
To avoid them
As much as is
Possible

After all
Time is precious
And single people
Are so much
More fun

All in all
I’d say
That the
Future of
Funerals
Is very
Bright indeed

jhmarkowitz
Philadelphia, Pa. 2011

Every Wedding

Every wedding
Is an invitation
To a funeral
And
Every funeral
Is an invitation
To a wedding
And
Every birth
Is an invitation
To death
And
Every death
Is an invitation
To new life

Om
Peace
Shalom
Shanti
Shanti
Shanti

jhmarkowitz
Philadelphia, Pa. 2011

It’s A Matter Of Belief

I believe in the laws
Of karma
And in the doctrine of
Reincarnation
Meaning
Endless cycles
Of death and
Rebirth
Is this a Jewish idea?
Not necessarily so
Although the Torah
Does talk about
The resurrection of
The dead
When comes the
Messiah
I believe less
In the coming
(Or second coming
If you prefer)
Of the messiah
Than I do
In the coming
(God willing)
Of a
Messianic era
When
Justice shall flow
Like a mighty stream
And all humans
Will live in harmony
As brothers and sisters
And when
The lion will lie down
With the lamb
And when we
Shall all beat
Our swords
Into plowshares
And neither
Shall we
Learn war
Any more

Will I live
To see the dawning
Of such an era
In my own
Lifetime?

Perhaps
Perhaps not
I am not
Holding my
Breath
Do I believe
That the world
As it presently
Exists
Needs a savior?
I would
Answer
In the affirmative
For
Long lays the world
In sin and error
Pining
And men
Have forgotten
That the soul
Has its worth

Brothers and Sisters
Let’s face it
The world
Desperately
Needs
All of the help
That it can get

jhmarkowitz
Philadelphia, Pa. 2011

Those Were The Good Old Days

It used to be so easy
Living here with you
You were bright and breezy
And I knew
Just what to do
Now you look
So unhappy
And I feel
Like a fool
(lyrics by Carole King)

Yeah, I know
You can’t go
Home again
But that
Doesn’t mean
That I wouldn’t
Like to
If I only could

I would like
To go back
To the time
When you
Told me
That you loved me
Remember that?

I would like
To go back
To the time
When we both
Lived and loved
together
In our house
Not your house
Not my house
But our house
Remember that?

I would like
To go back
To the time
When you said
That you
Wanted to have
A baby
And I said
Yes
Because
I was still
In love with you
And I wanted
Us all to be okay
And happy
Remember that?

I would like
To go back
To the time
When our
Little girl
Would rush
Into my arms
To say hello
When I returned
Home from
Work
Having just
Flown home
From Albany
In the State helicopter
And having driven
The Long Island Expressway
Like a madman
Just so I could
Get home
In time for dinner
Remember that?

But when
It came down
To choosing
Between
Having
A loving family
Or going
Insane
You chose
Madness
As you do
To this very day

Me and our baby
Weren’t even
A close second
And come to think
Of it
We never
Even had a chance
Did we?

jhmarkowitz
Philadelphia, Pa. 2011